Brenda Novak | Getting it Done...
Want to read more books, write more pages, lose weight, exercise daily or achieve some other goal? Do it by boosting your willpower!
Boost Your Willpower
Spring is on its way and with it warmer weather. When those layers come off, we’re faced with the pounds we’ve gained over the winter, which prompts many of us to attempt a “just in time for summer” diet. But chocolate cake is now and summer is later and far too often "now" wins over "later." Or…we’ve always dreamed of completing a manuscript, but instead of sitting at the computer and pushing through to “The End,” we allow an email addiction to thwart us. Or…we’ve heard about the health benefits of regular exercise but we procrastinate each day and never get around to engaging in it.
How do we conjure enough willpower to overcome these and other self-defeating behaviors?
I don’t have all the answers, but I did run across an interesting article on this subject written by Tara Parker Pope in The New York Times. Her tips, combined with my own experience, form the following five-step plan:
1. Eat several small meals a day.
Studies show that lower blood glucose levels coincide with less willpower. Keeping your blood glucose up helps you have more self-control. According to Pope, researchers have found that test subjects “who drink sugar-sweetened lemonade, which raises glucose levels quickly, perform better on self-control tests than those who drink artificially-sweetened beverages, which have no effect on glucose.”
Being the mother of a diabetic child, I’ve seen the glucose phenomenon work on an exaggerated scale. When my son goes “low,” he has much more trouble controlling his emotions. Although he’s a child who is normally very well-adjusted and happy, he will suddenly burst into tears for very little reason. Restore his blood glucose levels, and he’s fine, perfectly capable of restraining himself.
I’m not proposing we all drink more soda and get fat while trying to boost our self-control enough to diet. LOL Instead, as most dieticians suggest, we need to eat several small, healthy meals each day.
2. Keep long-term goals in mind.
The ability to delay gratification grows with maturity. I remember learning that in a psychology class, but even for adults delaying gratification can be difficult. How do you forgo the dessert you’re craving now for a reward (getting slimmer) that happens so gradually and over time? According to Kathleen Vohs, one expert quoted in Ms. Pope’s article, you “conjure up powerful memories of the things you value in life.” To me, this says that you look at the big picture. Ask yourself, “Do I want this piece of cake more than I want to look good this summer?”
Often putting it in perspective—picturing yourself looking slim and attractive in those summer months—will make the temptation less appealing.
3. Practice.
Use your willpower in order to strengthen it.
Working out every day is not an easy thing to do. If you don’t prioritize, other activities will invariably get in the way. Not only that, but after a few minutes of pushing yourself physically your body starts screaming, “Stop! I’m tired.”
After exercising religiously for 65 minutes a day, five times a week, for seventeen years, however, I can promise you exercise becomes routine, if not easy. It’s the practice of overcoming myself each day that has made it so much less of an ordeal. And flexing my willpower in this regard has boosted my self-control in other areas. It gives me a "reservoir of strength" to draw from.
4. Start small.
This was the part of Pope’s article I found especially interesting. She says, “A vow to stop swearing, to make the bed every day or to give up just one food may be a way to strengthen your self-control, giving you more willpower reserves for bigger challenges later.”
This is what I was saying about exercise. You can carry the willpower you develop in one area over to other areas, making it easier for you to hit your goals there, too.
5. Focus on one or two behaviors at a time.
Instead of trying to change a million different behaviors at once, which is a sure way to fail, at which point you get discouraged (hardly conducive to boosting your willpower), concentrate on the biggest thing you’d like to change in your life. Once you’ve modified your behavior, and turned that behavior into a habit, focus on another goal and then another. For instance, decide that you’re going to write for X number of hours a day. Do that until it’s a habit; then maintain it while shooting for a new goal.
I know, it’s easy to make suggestions and much harder to live by them. It’s not quite as simple as the above may sound. As long as you’re living and breathing, there will be things you wish you were doing that you’re not, but I do believe these tips help. If you have any others to add to the list, let me know!
Brenda Novak is the national bestselling author of 25 novels. Summer 2008 will see the release of her next three romantic suspense stories—TRUST ME, STOP ME, and WATCH ME, coming from Mira Books. Visit her Web site at http://www.brendanovak.com/ to learn more about her and her work, or to participate in her annual on-line auction for diabetes research which takes place May 1 – May 31s
This is what I was saying about exercise. You can carry the willpower you develop in one area over to other areas, making it easier for you to hit your goals there, too.
5. Focus on one or two behaviors at a time.
Instead of trying to change a million different behaviors at once, which is a sure way to fail, at which point you get discouraged (hardly conducive to boosting your willpower), concentrate on the biggest thing you’d like to change in your life. Once you’ve modified your behavior, and turned that behavior into a habit, focus on another goal and then another. For instance, decide that you’re going to write for X number of hours a day. Do that until it’s a habit; then maintain it while shooting for a new goal.
I know, it’s easy to make suggestions and much harder to live by them. It’s not quite as simple as the above may sound. As long as you’re living and breathing, there will be things you wish you were doing that you’re not, but I do believe these tips help. If you have any others to add to the list, let me know!
Brenda Novak is the national bestselling author of 25 novels. Summer 2008 will see the release of her next three romantic suspense stories—TRUST ME, STOP ME, and WATCH ME, coming from Mira Books. Visit her Web site at http://www.brendanovak.com/ to learn more about her and her work, or to participate in her annual on-line auction for diabetes research which takes place May 1 – May 31s
Labels: Brenda Novak, diabetes, willpower
13 Comments:
Hi Brenda! Great comments and so useful in any part of our lives. I think it goes long with the whole "New Year's Resolutions" too. They can be so largely focused that you set yourself up for defeat. Everyone's threshold is different.
I always struggle with weight, so rather than make this big proclamations about losing a zillion pounds and eating cabbage soup for a year (which goes against my very active sweet tooth lol), I instead try to start by focusing my goals on something much smaller - First goal, cut out sodas. It's a maneagable goal and when it's accomplished, makes it so much easier to add to that list. Before you know it, you're eating better all around and the inevitable goal of losing weight takes care of itself.
It is funny, however, that "no dessert" is rarely one of my options. LOL
Brenda, these are great tips. Weight is one of my problems, too. I need to exercise every day just to maintain...not to lose weight, but I go in spurts with both eating too much and exercising. I do well for a month and then not so well for a month. :) I need to stay consistent, like you!
You continue to inspire and motivate. You always amaze me. You're everywhere! Always lending a hand and/or giving helpful advice. :)
Good luck with the auction this year. I will be there bidding as always. And I have vowed to read a lot more this year, so your new suspense stories, TRUST ME, STOP ME, WATCH ME will be the perfect place to start this Summer!
Thanks for the informative post,
Theresa
Brenda, what a timely post--our local RWA chapter is getting ready to start a "Novel in 90" writing exercise. Its so easy to look at the idea of writing 400+ pages and get overwhelmed, but breaking it into smaller, daily steps--like 5 pages a day--really helps make it obtainable.
Now about losing weight... ;-)
You asked: Want to read more books, write more pages, lose weight, exercise daily..? Yeah, that about covers it!
And I can't think of anyone better suited to address the topic than you, with all you've accomplished: fabulous writing career, raising great kids, and of course your auction.
I'm still inspired by the RWA talk you gave where you talked about your bike ride "to the top of the mountain" -- all great things are accomplished one pedal turn at a time.
Your list here certainly hits the big points of "growing willpower." I've got a couple thoughts to add...
I find the best way for me to get exercise is to combine it with something I was going to do anyway. Take a bike to the store. Walk to the local Starbuck's for a writing session. Use the hand edger on the lawn instead of the power one.
Also, as far as keeping glucose levels steady ... I find the best way to do this for me is by keeping my carb count to 80 grams or less a day. It has the same net effect, I think, as several small meals a day, but is easier to handle with my schedule. It doesn't require any special planning, and my sweets craving has just about disappeared. And yes, I'm losing weight, slowly but steadily.
I think one of your most important points may be the Long Term Goals thing. I've found I can dredge up a great deal of willpower by battling "what I want" with "what I want MORE." And the big, long term goals (like, in my case, retiring early) almost always win. :-)
Thanks as always for a great set of tips.
Hi Jeannie--Thanks for joining me. I love your suggestion about starting small by cutting out soda. I personally think sodas are terrible for your health. My sons want to be athletes, so I tell them athletes don't drink soda, that they're smarter about the kind of fuel they put in their bodies. LOL So far, it's worked pretty good to keep soda to a minimum. Of course, with Thad's diabetes, soda is especially terrible for him.
Hi Theresa--I've done well with daily exercise, but I haven't done well in curbing my sweet tooth. Now that I spend so much time behind the computer, I'm finding the pounds are creeping on as I get older. This is going to take some major willpower on my part, which is why I was interested in the article I quoted. I either have to start exercising twice a day or stop eating so darn much! LOL
Congrats on your GH finalings. I'm so excited for you!!
Brenda
Hi Kellie--The Novel in 90 Days idea sounds great. You Calgary people have such a fabulous chapter.
You're right about what you can accomplish one step at a time. My web person just created a .pdf of all my published novels and sent it to me to proof--and I couldn't believe I'd actually written so many books. LOL It didn't seem like it until they were all right there, spread out before me. Just five pages a day will result in volumes. LOL
Brenda
Sandy, your opening comment cracked me up. That about covers it for me, too--except I'd like to reverse signs of aging, as well. LOL
I love your idea to make things you do ordinarily more active. Then you don't notice the exercise. I look forward to riding my Exercycle because it's the only time I have to read. So if I'm in a good book, I'm eager to get going. That's how I started out with exercise. I wouldn't let myself read SHOGUN until I was peddling at the gym, and there were days I went well over an hour just because I couldn't put it down. LOL
Brenda
Fabulous advice, Brenda! What a great five step plan!!
Cheers, Julie Rowe
Thanks, Julie! Great to see you here!
Brenda
Hi Brenda!
Love the small steps attitude. If you try to change everything at once, you only set yourself up for failure.
I can so relate to the giving up sodas...I finally got off them and switched to water (although I was a diet soda fiend...less sugar, more chemicals--yum!)~but once the detox was done, the change was amazing.
Now if I can just give up the sourdough bread.
Thanks for sharing!
Anna....give up bread? Perish the thought. LOL
Hmm, probably not too hard to figure out why weight is an issue for me. LOLOL Bread and sweets.
Hi Brenda
I can totally relate to the starting small. That's how I made writing a habit rather than a marathon when the muse hit. Now it fits nicely after supper every week day night and every weekend morning and between that, when the muse hits.
But exercise and junk food - another story. Junk food is comforting after all the expectations of the day combined with a long, cold winter. I was dreading another resolution but beginning April 1, I planned to go cold turkey on the junk food, fast forward on the exercise - guaranteed to fail in 4 or 5 days. Thanks so much Brenda, small bites instead and I might succeed - there's hope after a long Saskatchewan winter.
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